Yuumei
by Violent-Tendencies
Summary: shounen-ai; one-shot. Which is better: infamy or nothing? "Well," Jounouchi began, "that's a stupid question."


VT: Gurgle. I thought this fic up two minutes ago and said, "DAMMIT! I MUST WRITE IT!" and then my mom told me not to yell inside Wal-Mart. Anyway, I was being all obsessive with first person and trying to figure out whom I could write it best as. So, I took those "Which Yuugi-ou Character Are You?" quiz thingers and got Yami no Bakura each time, but who the hell wants to hear about the tomb-robber's views on society? No one.  
So, who the hell would make such dumb commentary? (I'm walking you through the process here; I think I'm high) Kaiba: he wouldn't even care. Ryou: he's too busy being raped. Yuugi: hair gel has warped his brain far beyond any comprehension of this. Anzu: HAHAHAHAHA! Malik: he should get his navel pierced, but that has nothing to do with my fic. Jou: ... Hm, Jou... He might actually be clever enough for this no matter how many times Kaiba preaches otherwise. Jou might work.  
So hell, I figured if I can make Kaiba a sentimental moron, I can make Jou a caustic psuedo-intellectual. :D  
Damn, that's a long note.

WARNING: Excruciatingly light shonen-ai (of course), cursing (duh), and some controversial thought (thought? like, thinking?). If this offends you, you just wasted a shit-load of time reading my note there.

DISCLAIMER: Yuugi-ou is not mine but Ryou's yami is. ;D

Quote of the Hour: "Ryuuji had declared long ago that Jou should wear a dog suit for some underlying sexual reason no one can possibly fathom without having consumed at least five shots of tequila and a bag of pixie sticks." -Wicked Fairytales for the Disturbed Mind

* * *

_Yuumei _(Famous)  
-x- First Person: Jounouchi Katsuya -x- 

So Yuugi got another one of those letters; you know, the ones that say, "Oh my gosh! You are so cool! I wish I could duel like you. You're so famous, you're practically a celebrity; the sun shines out of your ass; I wear lethal amounts of leather so I can be just like you, blah, blah, blah." Ugh. Make me sick.

But hey, don't get me wrong; I love the guy. I... I'm just, you know, a little...

jealous.

There, I admit it; but you would be too when your best friend is bombarded by fan girls, boys, and grandparents and the best you've gotten is: "Hey, isn't that 'what's his face'?"

"Yeah, that's him; let's get something to eat."

Ya damn right "that's him" Godfather of duel monsters and the best I can get is distracted by a burger joint!

Hn, that's depressing. I've only gotten to my locker, and I'm already depressed. God, it's Friday; I should be downright jovial, but I've realized it: come Saturday morning, no one's going to give a shit what happened to the blonde at locker B12, not a damn person 'cause they'll be too caught up in their TV shows and Captain Crush to care. I hate Captain Crunch; I don't even think he's a naval commander... even a falsified cartoon is more renowned than I am!

GARG! Pisses me off. Is it really too much to ask that some one on the street just look up and wonder if that's the real **Jounouchi-sama**, or for the wankers in America, "ain't that the Wheeler guy?" Sure it's a little selfish, but that's all I want: just to be made immortal through speech, to be kept alive in memory and thought. Dammit, that's all I'll ever want.

I slam my locker shut; I think I've been here a while. I left in the middle of class to get my textbook, and the bell just rang. Meh, like I'm ever going to use Geometry. I can identify shapes. Kaiba's head's a walnut; heh, see? I'm failing because my teacher's just out to get me. I wonder if she'll remember me. Well, infamous is better than nothing. In fact, that's actually all there is: infamy or nothing. No one's really "_famous_."

Yuugi's not renowned for saving the world multiple times or graciously giving me all that prize money or protecting his loved ones. No, he's known for beating Kaiba and mentally destroying Pegasus. Otogi's not recognized for his dungeon game thing or electronic know-how, but for being a crybaby when challenging the king of games. And Honda, not for being a good fighter and better friend, but instead for that ridiculous haircut of his. Everybody's infamous, because everybody else only remembers foul things.

Wow, I wonder if anyone else has thought of it this way... people that saw the price of this disgraceful eternal life. Did Cain Bible referenceRUN! think this way? Mussolini? What about bin Laden, King Ramsey? Martha Stewart?

...Did I just compare myself to Ms. At-Home-Living?

I lean back on my locker as I watch others scramble to theirs. So many people... there's Anzu, Honda, Wataru, Yuugi's hair is hard to miss. The rest are just faces, like I am to them. Unrecognizable features that scurry about. Well that's depressing.

I let a sigh escape. So this is what it comes to: infamy or anonymity. Being notorious or just another indistinguishable statistic in a sea of nameless faces. The former sounds better than the latter, don't it? I agree.

So there has to be something I can say, something that I can do that'll shock some and disgust enough to have them still talking about it on Monday. Some sort of word or action that can keep me alive in their memory long enough for them to try figuring out my name.

"Now's no time to take a nap, Mutt." The entire hall pauses functioning from the moment words spew from Kaiba's mouth. But he's just about legendary enough, right? Notorious for kicking ass, suspected for homicide, and venerated for mentally exploiting proletariats like myself on a daily basis, I guess the guy can just command respect like that.

Just then, I remember, 'Hey, I'm supposed to fire some witty retort at this asshole.' But then, I also remember that I have an entire school and a half staring at me and Sunshine here. It _would _be a waste, wouldn't it?

x-

Running for my now infamous ass, I can't help but realize: for somebody as toughened by myth as Kaiba, it's rather remarkable how soft his lips are.

_Owari _(End)

* * *

VT: Man, I hope somebody got that. :Does the "I Feel Cynical" dance: It was... interesting to write; there was a lot of dry humour tossed in and some shounen-ai to throw everyone off. So I finally did a "funny" fic, I hope is satiated some people. :stare: 

Friend #1: Geez Sheila, why don't your ever write humour; you'd be really good!  
Friend #2 (Japanese wannabe): Hai.  
Me: ...YOUR MOM:runs away crying:  
Friend #1: I wonder if she's on her period...  
Friend #2: That's a girl?

Please review!


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